Greetings Schmoozers!
Like last month, Charlie and Karol have mostly relinquished
the floor to the Schmoozers for this blog post. Also like last month, they realized there was no way they could
top the novel critique Schmmoze blog post for 2012 (read it
HERE).
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| The Schmoozers in action |
Here are the blog post prompts we put out to the 23 brave writers in attendance:
The most important thing I learned about my manuscript
was...
– Hmm, let’s just say all the information I thought was on
the first page WAS NOT THERE.
CAROL BARTH
– I took a risk with my novel's voice, and the overwhelming
response amongst my group was that it worked. Beyond that, I got a very
helpful suggestion to help make my opening paragraph much stronger with the
addition of a single sentence.
Garrett Vander Leun
– Too much telling.
LAURIE YOUNG
– The most important thing that I learned about my piece (3
pages from a writing prompt) was that it could become a middle-grade book. I'm
still smiling from the kind and encouraging feedback I received.
CHERYL MANNING
– My transitions could be smoother.
DC
– I need to watch out for
repeating what's been said. Keep the writing tight.
PATRICIA O’BRIEN
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| Last Leaf on the Tree Table (moderated by Charlie Cohen) |
–...that it is a mistake to bring transitional scenes to a
critique. I got so sick of
bringing the first 4 pages of my book I thought I'd bring the next four. But those depend entirely on the first
four to make sense. So I wasted a
lot of valuable critique time answering questions that were answered in the
first four pages. I wanted to see
if there were things I could cut in the transition, but it was hard for anyone
to judge, not knowing what I was transitioning from and to. So what I learned was: Bring scenes
where something happens. Scenes
that are, at least a bit, self contained.
Hmm.... Seems obvious now that I look at it, but...
CHARLIE COHEN
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The "No You Can't Sit at Our Table" Table
(moderated by Karol Ruth Silverstein) |
– That, for a lesser writer, bringing a scene 100 pages into
a manuscript to a critique might not work, but for brilliant old me… No seriously, the thing I got was
confirmation that the pivotal scene I brought
is coming across as awkwardly and
honestly as I’d hoped.
KAROL RUTH SILVERTEIN
The most important thing I learned about writing for
middle grade kids / teens was...
– You will be properly ridiculed if your main character says
she lives on THE WESTSIDE.
CAROL BARTH
– In spite of my novel's unique
and 'successful' voice, I still need to moderate how fully I use it because it
could lead to comprehension problems for younger readers.
GARRETT VANDER LEUN
– Be careful with word choice/vocabulary in your writing.
 |
| Four Fatal Femmes Table (moderated by Laurie Young) |
– Not to front-load the manuscript with background
information. Dive head first into the mess and sprinkle background information
as needed. Hook 'em from page one.
CHERYL MANNING
– Start in the action
LAURIE YOUNG
– Anything goes.
Really.
KAROL RUTH SILVERSTEIN
– I didn't exactly learn it, but it was brought back home to
me: Never write down, and never preach.
But this is true for any age, from toddler to geezer.
CHARLIE COHEN
The biggest surprise for me at the May Schmooze was...
– I was surprised by how well received my work was.
Writing is such a solitary endeavor and it's always a little gut
wrenching to finally take your little monster out for a stroll. To not
have everyone gasp in horror was a wonderful surprise.
GARRETT VANDER LEUN
– I didn't offend everyone at the table with my comments. I
only offended HALF the table.
CAROL BARTH
– ...how amazingly well some folks can write. Every time I sit at a critique table
with "newbies," I am amazed that there are really terrific, visionary
writers out there who have not before been to our schmoozes. I mean, real writers who, somehow, got
to this level of ability without us!!
HOW does this happen??!
Does this mean Karol and I are not the sun and the moon; the mother's milk
of all your creativity? That you
people are the real talents and we, just trained monkeys, who hop around for
your amusement? Well, that's
probably as it should be.
CHARLIE COHEN
 |
501st Legion - The Wolf Pack Table
(moderated by Blue Leader AKA Jeffery Cox) |
– How interesting some of the stories people are working on
turned out to be.
JOSHUA HAUKE
– How committed the participants are.
LAURIE YOUNG
– (My tablemates were) awesome speed 'critters.' Really.
It's not easy to give good advice under time limits, but they excelled.
PATRICIA O’BRIEN
– Enjoying my
pages being read out loud -- thanks to the wonderful job by Mara
CHERYL MANNING
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| Where ideas come from? |
– …What!?! No espresso brownies?!? Noooooooooo!!!
ANONYMOUS
The most inspiring thing I heard at the May schmooze
was...
– It's incredible how patient children's writers are and the
lengths they will go to TACTFULLY tell me my pages need MORE WORK.
CAROL BARTH
– That my fellow critiquers wanted to read more of my story.
LAURIE YOUNG
– There was a woman who claimed she wasn't capable of
writing anything beyond a few simple short stories... And then she
brought in this amazing short story that was loaded with original characters
and a very unique plot that lends itself PERFECTLY to a longer-format story - -
- not to mention that it only contains a handful of ideas from the author's
incredible life story. You don't know what you got until you sit down and
give it a shot! Don't say 'I can't' - just write!
GARRETT VANDER LEUN
– "Hey, they're are cookies over there." or
"It's almost time for the SCBWI Summer conference."
JOSHUA HAUKE
– "COOKIES!"
CHARLIE COHEN
And a few
random thoughts/comments:
– Fresh eyes bring fresh insights. No matter how many people
look at a manuscript, a new reader may see something missed by
others. It is such a pleasure to
talk about writing with other writers.
PATRICIA O’BRIEN
– Inspiration works in mysterious ways. I just love being
privy to the creative fruit and process of such diverse writers. Slowly, I feel
my own flow desiring to be shared. And I surprise myself with all my comments
during the critiques! I hope the love is clear.
DEBORAH COLE
 |
| Not Charlie's Table (moderated by Lee Wind) |
– Whenever someone says you're only going to get to share
the first five pages of your manuscript, there's a desire that I imagine is
universal, to want to cram in more - twiddle with the margins, do a full first
page - because there's a fear that if they don't see enough of it they won't
'get it.' In our group on the novel critique night, we suggested that
someone else besides the writer read the text aloud, and for one of our
critique pieces, the reader only got to about three pages in before the reading
time was running out. The author commented that the person could maybe
read the rest faster, but all the major points of feedback we had to give were
already apparent in the first three pages. (In fact, they were evident on
the first page.) It reminded me that as much as I, too, chafe at the idea
of having my work appraised based on only a small portion, the DNA for the entire
book is right there in the first three pages… the first page… and dare I say,
maybe even the first few lines? It was a good lesson to re-learn.
We couldn’t have said it better...everyone!
Huge thanks to our table monitors and to Molly Mueller for snapping all the great photos.
Join us June 12th for the niche Schmooze – where
we’ll explore the road-to-publishing less traveled. Plus – we want to hear your ideas on what Schmooze topics we
should schedule for next year.
Until the, keep passing the open windows.
Charlie & Karol
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